The birth of Intentionally Remarkable

August 31, 2015

Today I decided to be intentionally remarkable.

For most of my life I feel like I have been always trying to live up to an expectation set before me. Whether they were actually there, or perceived I have always felt like I wasn’t good enough. I’d bring a B+ home and would get “you can do better than that.” I’d get 7 blocks in a volleyball game and get “you can do better than that.” I had a c-section and thought to myself “you can do better than that.” And then when I wouldn’t “do better than that” I would feel like a failure. I would feel inadequate, and simply ordinary.

I am always striving to be better at everything thing that I do. A better woman, a better wife, a better mother, a better massage therapist, a better friend. Because of this constant struggle I have become better, yet I haven’t recognized it.

It is difficult for me to believe when a person compliments me. The negative self-talk doesn’t let me accept and freely receive them. Recently, someone whom I deeply respect paid me the best professional compliment that I’ve ever received and I have been struggling because I want to believe it. I want to believe that I am worthy.

Today during a massage I decided to be intentionally remarkable. Most of the time I rarely watch my hands while I’m massaging. I’m present, but not using my eyes to direct the massage. I let my hands be in charge of the session. Today, I watched them. I watched them move, stop at a muscle or a place where they noticed a reaction ever so slight from the client, I watched the way them for over an hour and realized that I am worthy. 
Humble, Honest & Honored. I am far from ordinary.

Intentionally Remarkable,

Angie